Slipping
Most of you have no doubt noticed a shift in focus on this blog. It's been quite the growing experience. When I first began, I was unhappy with my weight, but at the same time, I knew that buying into the societal ideals of perfection was not part of my mindset. Yes, I wanted to lose this excess weight, but more than anything I wanted to portray the psychological effects of living in a society that constantly waves its ever changing definitions of perfection in your face.
Over time, the weight ceased to be such an issue as I discovered that my real concern wasn't so internal, but rather this ridiculous ideal that most of us at one time or another buy into.
Of as late, my focus has broadened into other women's issues, especially as I learn more about feminist theory. I was always taught that feminists were man-hating bitches who were only concerned with not being pretty. However, in the past year or two, I've learned that what I've always thought and haven't been able to verbalize has a name. It's called feminism.
These shifts are quite normal for me as an artist. I tend to explore something that bothers me until I work it out. Someone once asked me why my images are so harsh. I think it's because I wasn't allowed to voice any opposing opinion as a child. We didn't dare disagree without punishment. Finally I have found my voice, and I'm screaming, "Listen to me!!!"--even though it's from a photograph.
This post doesn't really have a point related to any topic on the blog. I just feel torn. I find myself not posting because an image doesn't relate to the blog. At times I think it's served its purpose and I should start a new one instead of trying to broaden the subject matter on this one. Who knows? It may not even matter! What do you guys think?
posted by Christi Nielsen at 9:50 AM
8 Comments:
Just to let you know that I've read this post Christi.
I'm thinking about it and will be back :)
Right. Back now :)
I first found this blog because of your art which is very powerful and speaks at a level that words simply can't.
I understand that the weight issues were your focus in the begining and, over time, I've noticed the broadening of the subject matter of your posts. I guess that hasn't seemed out of place to me because I always thought this was a feminist blog anyway!
I suppose it all depends on your view of the long term 'purpose' of the blog. If you want to keep it as an examination of women and the and weight issue and it's served that purpose well, you could start another one. And the one you start could cover the broader subject matter you're leaning towards.
My feelings, though, are that the two are very stongly connected, and this blog - as an account of your verbalisation of what you've always thought but never been able to name till recently - has always been about much more than the women and weight issue.
I have the feeling that, if you keep posting about stuff you've always thought but haven't been able to verbalise, your talent for imagery will soon join in.
But even if it doesn't do that in a way you'd want to post here it seems to me that if you find yourself not posting because an image doesn't relate to something you want to blog about - you can always make a post without an image.
I guess what I'm saying is: you are your whole self, not only an artist.
Does this make sense? There is v loud music blasting in my house and it's interfering with my thoughts!
Whatever you put here Christi, I view as your art. I don't see dividing lines, although with some posts I see the writing as a search or explication of the image. Not only the artist's finished piece but the process. I think it's a privilege to watch this.
ah, feminist theory, how it verbalizes a whole set of thoughts that seem "right" but somehow aren't the way we are taught to think. I remember before my one and only women's studies class I called myself a 'humanist' because I believed in the equality of all people, not realizing that I was trying to include women without offending anyone. Now I gladly call myself a feminist.
I've always thought that your words are as important as your images and that you are exploring feminist issues. I would hope that you continue to post either words or photos or both as a preference to none.
Janis
memaxmarz on flickr
Thank you Witchy, Pony, and Janis. I suppose I'm just going through a bit of uncertainty fed by the stress that always accompanies the end of the semester! ;-)
I shall stay the course.
Yay! I'm v glad to read that :)
keep the blog.. I love to see you evolve. Maybe the title doesn't necessarily fit anymore, so if anything, I could see changing that. But I love how you work through your issues for all of us to see here. I'm sure it's very therapeutic.. and I think you've found lots of answers! I am a lot like you in how you think about women's issues and societies pressures, etc. I'm glad you've learned to beat the social demons telling us to be thin! I think having a more fitness oriented blog like mine keeps me in that mindset though... So I haven't been as lucky as you :)
I had a whole comment and trying to log in so I could post deleted the whole thing.
I'm a little late, but I wanted to weigh in on this.
I'm an occasional visitor (I like showing up once a month or so and catching up) and your blog has always come across as a feminist blog to me. I find it inspiring - I was a feminist before I was a photographer. I have all sorts of ideas for mixing the two together, but you actually do it, and do it well. I hope that you decide to keep the blog going as whatever you want it to evolve into. I really enjoy your "voice".
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